A FRIEND

I’ve always been a shy person. It’s not easy for me to connect with people given that most of the time when someone tries to get close to me I shut myself in. And not because I want to, but because I don’t know how to respond. A few years ago I used to panic every time a classmate would start to talk to me. It gave me anxiety the whole social aspect of life.

And of course, people weren’t patient enough to give me the time to process how to say “Hi” back. After all, it’s understandable.

So for a long time in my life I just had classmates and neighbors. It wasn’t a situation I liked, but deep down I knew I was living it because I had chosen it. Remember how a few blogs back I talked how I loved my comfort zone? Well, that love also brought consequences to me.

Being alone at home, with your room and all your stuff, it’s a lot easier than being alone at school, where everyone has a group. Breaks were the worst. Because it wasn’t only being alone (again, kind of by own choice) but also being ashamed of it. So, instead of staying in the classroom I always preferred go to the library. If anything good could’ve came out of this time was that it developed my love for reading. But that’s another story for another blog.

This kept happening up until my first year of high school. Until I met her. No, I’m not talking about my friend yet, that’ll come later. I’m talking about my new headmaster, Mrs. Berta. She was the strictest teacher I’ve known so far. She hated all that could eventually cause disorder in the class and fought against indiscipline. Not in a Dursley kind of way, but more in a I-want-the-best-for-you way. I will always remember the first thing she said to us when she walked through the door the first day: “If I find any of you chewing gum in class I myself will stick it in your hair”.

Before that year, anyone would sit wherever they wanted to. This, of course, caused trouble to teachers because of the typical group of friends who would sit in the back of the classroom and talk the entire time. Surely Mrs. Berta was not okay with this. She made a scheme detailing who would sit with who, and being deaf to all the protests, she made us write our names and stick them to the tables. She also told all our teachers that if the saw someone who wasn’t in their place all they had to do was talk to her, and that was a very dangerous thing to happen so everyone stood in their places for the rest of the year. This is how I met my friend. Or at least one of them.

The first thing you need to know about Antonia is that she likes to talk. Like, really likes to talk. And with Mrs. Berta’s new order, she had found herself sitting next to Alexander Lizana. Now, he was… something. He was the kind of person you didn’t talk to because you knew nothing good could come out of it. Really prideful and not funny at all, Alexander was also alone most of the time because he chose to. So when Antonia got tired of hearing about how much Alexander knew about history, and how his grades where almost the best of the class (Antonia’s were better), she decided to start talking to the next person close to her. Me.

But I was still shy. Whenever she tried to start a conversation I would take it to a dead end, not even pretending to. I was so sure it would go just as the other times someone tried to talk to me. Then again, Antonia really likes to talk, and she’s not afraid to talk to new people. So she kept trying to have a conversation that lasted more than one minute with me, and in all that time I got use to her. Not that she made me the most social person there is to find on Earth, but without noticing she gave me the space I needed to react.

As the weeks went by, it got easier for me to keep up with the small talks. I learned that she loved anime and that I loved it too. I also learned about her life, and that even when she seemed happy all the time, harsh things had happened to her. I learned that she didn’t like to cry in front of people, not even in front of me. I learned how much of a dork she was. I learned I was one too.

And because of her, I meet my other good friend, Daniela. She was our new classmate that same year, and Antonia had been talking a lot to her (shocking, I know). She introduced us. Daniela was also a dork. I think that, between other things, was what made us connect. And also the fact that in the breaks we would play “Rock, paper, scissors, truth”. With the passage of a few months we knew a lot about each other. But it wasn’t scary for me at all, because I trusted them.

Up until this day we are in touch. In fact, this weekend we are going to meet to… I don’t know what we will do yet… I think we’ll improvise something.

Anyways, that’s how I met my two best friends!